Teaching kids airplane etiquette: how to create good fliers

We’ve all been there, either as parents or innocent bystanders caught in the crossfire: a disastrous flight during which kids are causing more than their share of trouble. Sometimes it’s unavoidable: a tired baby a parent is trying to console, a sick child, a long layover. Other times–and I know you’ve seen this–kids behaving badly on planes when it’s avoidable with a few lessons in manners. When teaching kids airplane etiquette, we suggest the following while flying with kids:

Kids Airplane Etiquette:

1. Find your seat quickly. I don’t know if it’s just my kids, but there’s always a lot of debate over who’s going to sit where in our assigned seats. I’ve taught them to go straight to the seat listed on their ticket first, to get out of the aisle, and to swap places after the rest of the passengers have gotten on.

2. Wheel your rollie-bag properly. No carry-on luggage wars in the terminal, kids! Games of chicken and extreme rolling are not permitted in our family…anymore. I’m tired of my toes getting rolled over and the looks of disgust issued by business travelers.

3. Clean up trash. I instruct my kids to place snack trash into their cup, then hand the whole thing to the flight attendant. Getting out of the habit of putting anything–including trash–into the seat pocket ensures we don’t leave anything we need behind, like chargers or iPods.

flying-with-kids

4. Say hello to flight attendants when you board. Thank them as you deplane. Required. Enough said.

5. No kicking the seat in front of you.Whoa boy, is this a big one. And sometimes, it’s not the kid’s fault, if his or her legs are just the right (or wrong) length. Our kids know to tuck toes down or even sit ‘criss-cross applesauce’ to avoid the seat kicking issue. It’s a toughie.

Tips for parents:

1. Try to board early. Even if your kids are out of the age range that (sometimes) ensures pre-boarding, line up as soon as you’re able to based on your seat assignment. This will give you more time to stow carry-on baggage in the bulkhead while the main cabin is less crowded.

2. Prepare kids with a great eBook: Monsters Don’t Ride on Airplanes. Check out the screen shot of this adorable book below! We read it recently, and I think it’s a great tool to use with young kids. The simple story shows various silly-looking monsters on airplanes, doing everything wrong. Then is shows a girl and boy doing things right, with the message that well-behaved kids get to ride on airplanes and go to fun places (while monsters are left behind).

monsters-font-ride-on-airplanes

3. Avoid red-eye flights unless you know your kids will sleep. No one likes a crying baby. There’s little that’s more miserable on a plane than a red-eye during which young kids cannot sleep. We’ve been tempted by lower cost red-eye flights, but because our kids are not good sleepers on airplanes, we’ve learned to avoid them. Fly when your kids are at their best. If that time happens to be when they’re asleep…hey, we don’t judge!

4. Help security flow more smoothly. We almost always fly carry-on only, which means everyone has toiletries that may have 3 ounce containers. To make it easier on everyone when we go through security, I consolidate these items so they’re all in just one quart-sized bag. (Everyone’s tooth brushes, hair ties, and other non-liquid cosmetics and toiletries can remain in each person’s carry-on.) When we go through security, each kid knows he can place his backpack and his carry-on onto the belt without getting anything out.

5. Eat on the plane. Hey, it’s something to do, and it keeps kids happy. We’ve found that in most cases, purchasing a meal on a plane is no more expensive than purchasing a similar meal in the airport. And this way, we don’t have to carry a bag of food onboard. My kids love simple meals like fruit and cheese plates or snack baskets, and I love that they’re entertained by the novelty of airplane food for a few minutes. Plus for parents: Alaska Airlines flights offer complimentary local wines and craft brews for the adults!

6. Bring a headphone splitter. For some reason, it highly annoys me when parents set their kids up with a movie or cartoon on a plane, and subject the entire cabin to the audio. Are there worse things? Sure, but this problem is easily solved by buying a cheap headphone splitter and using kids headphones.

What are your top tips for airplane etiquette?

Open letter to the airline industry

open letter to the airline industry
Dear Airline Industry,

I know you’re hurting. I know money is tight these days (trust me), and I know new ways of ‘packaging’ airfare is required in this economy. I also know that I’d like to ride out the turbulence of these tough times with you. I’ve been in love with air travel since I munched my first honey-roasted peanut at 10,000 feet at the age of seven, and like many, many other families, sharing my love of air travel with my own children is important to me.

But you’re making it hard to stick by you. At a time when luxury resorts and cruise ships across the world are rolling out the red carpet for kids (I have personally worked with Expedia.com, Omni Resorts, and Preferred Hotels in their efforts to create family-friendly programs and offerings), you’re making it increasingly difficult for families to arrive at their destination. I’d say that traveling families are the ones suffering, but the truth is, airlines are shooting themselves in the foot.

How so? Let’s start with this month’s headliner: airlines charging for ‘premium’ coach seats. Premium…coach? Isn’t that an oxymoron? Before you hold families hostage in this manner, follow the trail of logic: who typically pays for airline upgrades? Business travelers. Solo travelers. Couples celebrating a special occasion like a honeymoon. Not family travelers, I can assure you. When I shop flights for my family of five, I’m looking for the best deal, and nothing more. After all, I still need to shelter, feed, and entertain my motley crew all vacation long.

So let’s apply this logic to an actual scenario: Business traveler Joe has upgraded his coach seat to premium level. (I’m trying not to laugh, really.) He’s happily sitting in his aisle seat for which he’s paid an extra $44. Single Traveling Parent Jane, her preschooler, and her toddler walk down the aisle to find their seats. Because Jane has not (and would never) pay to upgrade her seats, she has two middle seats and one window, necessitating a separation from at least one small child. As this is logistically ridiculous, the call to action falls on poor Business Traveler Joe, who has two choices, neither of which are attractive: 1. vacate the seat he just paid extra for, to allow Jane’s family to stay together, or 2. hold his ground, and entertain an unaccompanied toddler for the duration of the flight. Airline, you’ve accomplished two things here: you’ve angered Joe, who’s probably a frequent flyer and loyal customer, and you’ve upset Jane (who probably tweets). But wait, you have your $44, so you’re good.

There’s more. Because you’re charging for premium seats, Airline, and separating family groups, family travelers now have to pack more carry-on luggage. And you know you already think we pack too much! As a family travel writer, I’ve long advocated packing carry-on only or one carry-on per family (you’re welcome), but because I now have to plan for the contingency that my school-aged children will sit apart from me, each child needs his or her own backpack full of entertainment (and food…don’t get me started on that). More carry-on bags mean a greater burden on the already overloaded overhead luggage compartments (which, of course, is due to fees placed on checked luggage, but we won’t go there, either). So in this second scenario, in which I’ve boarded your plane with five carry-ons instead of one, what you get is increased stress, chaos, and crowds in your already over-stressed cabin. Not only are your overworked flight attendants negotiating my seats with disgruntled business travelers, but they’re now also trying to stuff my backpacks into bins. Backpacks that would not have existed had you not 1. charged me for checked bags (whoops, I went there) and 2. charged me to sit with my kids.

Airline, I’m not mad. Really. Some family-friendly airlines I love quite dearly. Mostly, I’m worried for you. You can run all the flashy promotions you’d like (some of your kids fly free deals are excellent), but at the end of the day, families won’t remember what deal you’re running on your website. They won’t care how convenient you made online check-in or how shiny your homepage is. They’re accustomed to the ordeal of security, and they’re even planning on you losing their luggage. What they will remember: the seven circles of hell you did or did not put them through in order to get from Point A to Point B.

Family travel is only gaining in popularity. The industry brands I work with every day, from eco-tour operations to luxury resorts, know this. But the travel industry cycle we’re all a part of only works if we can get where we’re going.

Please get on-board. We miss the family-friendly skies.

Sincerely,

A Family Travel Writer